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1
This chapter is dedicated to Amazon.com, the largest Internet bookseller in the world. Amazon is amazing — a “store” where you can get practically any book ever published (along with practically everything else, from laptops to cheese-graters), where they’ve elevated recommendations to a high art, where they allow customers to directly communicate with each other, where they are constantly inventing new and better ways of connecting books with readers. Amazon has always treated me like gold — the founder, Jeff Bezos, even posted a reader-review for my first novel! — and I shop there like crazy (looking at my spreadsheets, it appears that I buy something from Amazon approximately every six days). Amazon’s in the process of reinventing what it means to be a bookstore in the twenty-first century and I can’t think of a better group of people to be facing down that thorny set of problems.
1
This chapter is dedicated to Amazon.com, the largest Internet bookseller in the world. Amazon is amazing — a “store” where you can get practically any book ever published (along with practically everything else, from laptops to cheese-graters), where they’ve elevated recommendations to a high art, where they allow customers to directly communicate with each other, where they are constantly inventing new and better ways of connecting books with readers. Amazon has always treated me like gold — the founder, Jeff Bezos, even posted a reader-review for my first novel! — and I shop there like crazy (looking at my spreadsheets, it appears that I buy something from Amazon approximately every six days). Amazon’s in the process of reinventing what it means to be a bookstore in the twenty-first century and I can’t think of a better group of people to be facing down that thorny set of problems.3
1
“I’m thinking of majoring in physics when I go to Berkeley,” Darryl said. His dad taught at the University of California at Berkeley, which meant he’d get free tuition when he went. And there’d never been any question in Darryl’s household about whether he’d go.
1
“I’m thinking of majoring in physics when I go to Berkeley,” Darryl said. His dad taught at the University of California at Berkeley, which meant he’d get free tuition when he went. And there’d never been any question in Darryl’s household about whether he’d go.8
4
“Well, I can’t hide it, so I’m going to have to nuke it.” Killing arphids is a dark art. No merchant wants malicious customers going for a walk around the shop-floor and leaving behind a bunch of lobotomized merchandise that is missing its invisible bar-code, so the manufacturers have refused to implement a “kill signal” that you can radio to an arphid to get it to switch off. You can reprogram arphids with the right box, but I hate doing that to library books. It’s not exactly tearing pages out of a book, but it’s still bad, since a book with a reprogrammed arphid can’t be shelved and can’t be found. It just becomes a needle in a haystack.
4
“Well, I can’t hide it, so I’m going to have to nuke it.” Killing arphids is a dark art. No merchant wants malicious customers going for a walk around the shop-floor and leaving behind a bunch of lobotomized merchandise that is missing its invisible bar-code, so the manufacturers have refused to implement a “kill signal” that you can radio to an arphid to get it to switch off. You can reprogram arphids with the right box, but I hate doing that to library books. It’s not exactly tearing pages out of a book, but it’s still bad, since a book with a reprogrammed arphid can’t be shelved and can’t be found. It just becomes a needle in a haystack.9
2
That left me with only one option: nuking the thing. Literally. 30 seconds in a microwave will do in pretty much every arphid on the market. And because the arphid wouldn’t answer at all when D checked it back in at the library, they’d just print a fresh one for it and recode it with the book’s catalog info, and it would end up clean and neat back on its shelf.
2
That left me with only one option: nuking the thing. Literally. 30 seconds in a microwave will do in pretty much every arphid on the market. And because the arphid wouldn’t answer at all when D checked it back in at the library, they’d just print a fresh one for it and recode it with the book’s catalog info, and it would end up clean and neat back on its shelf.14
1
“The teacher’s lounge? Maybe you weren’t listening, Marcus. If I get busted just once more, I am expelled. You hear that? Expelled.”
1
“The teacher’s lounge? Maybe you weren’t listening, Marcus. If I get busted just once more, I am expelled. You hear that? Expelled.”15
“You won’t get caught,” I said. The one place a teacher wouldn’t be after this period was the lounge. “We’ll go in the back way.” The lounge had a little kitchenette off to one side, with its own entrance for teachers who just wanted to pop in and get a cup of joe. The microwave — which always reeked of popcorn and spilled soup — was right in there, on top of the miniature fridge.
“You won’t get caught,” I said. The one place a teacher wouldn’t be after this period was the lounge. “We’ll go in the back way.” The lounge had a little kitchenette off to one side, with its own entrance for teachers who just wanted to pop in and get a cup of joe. The microwave — which always reeked of popcorn and spilled soup — was right in there, on top of the miniature fridge.16
Darryl groaned. I thought fast. “Look, the bell’s already rung. if you go to study hall now, you’ll get a late-slip. Better not to show at all at this point. I can infiltrate and exfiltrate any room on this campus, D. You’ve seen me do it. I’ll keep you safe, bro.”
Darryl groaned. I thought fast. “Look, the bell’s already rung. if you go to study hall now, you’ll get a late-slip. Better not to show at all at this point. I can infiltrate and exfiltrate any room on this campus, D. You’ve seen me do it. I’ll keep you safe, bro.”17
1
He groaned again. That was one of Darryl’s tells: once he starts groaning, he’s ready to give in.
1
He groaned again. That was one of Darryl’s tells: once he starts groaning, he’s ready to give in.19
It was flawless. We skirted the classrooms, took the back stairs into the basement, and came up the front stairs right in front of the teachers’ lounge. Not a sound came from the door, and I quietly turned the knob and dragged Darryl in before silently closing the door.
It was flawless. We skirted the classrooms, took the back stairs into the basement, and came up the front stairs right in front of the teachers’ lounge. Not a sound came from the door, and I quietly turned the knob and dragged Darryl in before silently closing the door.20
1
The book just barely fit in the microwave, which was looking even less sanitary than it had the last time I’d popped in here to use it. I conscientiously wrapped it in paper towels before I set it down. “Man, teachers are pigs,” I hissed. Darryl, white faced and tense, said nothing.
1
The book just barely fit in the microwave, which was looking even less sanitary than it had the last time I’d popped in here to use it. I conscientiously wrapped it in paper towels before I set it down. “Man, teachers are pigs,” I hissed. Darryl, white faced and tense, said nothing.21
3
The arphid died in a shower of sparks, which was really quite lovely (though not nearly as pretty as the effect you get when you nuke a frozen grape, which has to be seen to be believed).
3
The arphid died in a shower of sparks, which was really quite lovely (though not nearly as pretty as the effect you get when you nuke a frozen grape, which has to be seen to be believed).23
Darryl opened the door and began to move out, me on his heels. A second later, he was standing on my toes, elbows jammed into my chest, as he tried to back-pedal into the closet-sized kitchen we’d just left.
Darryl opened the door and began to move out, me on his heels. A second later, he was standing on my toes, elbows jammed into my chest, as he tried to back-pedal into the closet-sized kitchen we’d just left.25
4
Charles Walker and I don’t get along. We’re in the same grade, and we’ve known each other as long as I’ve known Darryl, but that’s where the resemblance ends. Charles has always been big for his age, and now that he’s playing football and on the juice, he’s even bigger. He’s got anger management problems — I lost a milk-tooth to him in the third grade, and he’s managed to keep from getting in trouble over them by becoming the most active snitch in school.
4
Charles Walker and I don’t get along. We’re in the same grade, and we’ve known each other as long as I’ve known Darryl, but that’s where the resemblance ends. Charles has always been big for his age, and now that he’s playing football and on the juice, he’s even bigger. He’s got anger management problems — I lost a milk-tooth to him in the third grade, and he’s managed to keep from getting in trouble over them by becoming the most active snitch in school.26
1
It’s a bad combination, a bully who also snitches, taking great pleasure in going to the teachers with whatever infractions he’s found. Benson loved Charles. Charles liked to let on that he had some kind of unspecified bladder problem, which gave him a ready-made excuse to prowl the hallways at Chavez, looking for people to fink on.
1
It’s a bad combination, a bully who also snitches, taking great pleasure in going to the teachers with whatever infractions he’s found. Benson loved Charles. Charles liked to let on that he had some kind of unspecified bladder problem, which gave him a ready-made excuse to prowl the hallways at Chavez, looking for people to fink on.27
1
The last time Charles had caught some dirt on me, it had ended with me giving up LARPing. I had no intention of being caught by him again.
1
The last time Charles had caught some dirt on me, it had ended with me giving up LARPing. I had no intention of being caught by him again.30
“OK,” I said. “OK, time for emergency countermeasures.” I got my phone out. I’d planned this well in advance. Charles would never get me again. I emailed my server at home, and it got into motion.
“OK,” I said. “OK, time for emergency countermeasures.” I got my phone out. I’d planned this well in advance. Charles would never get me again. I emailed my server at home, and it got into motion.31
1
A few seconds later, Charles’s phone spazzed out spectacularly. I’d had tens of thousands of simultaneous random calls and text messages sent to it, causing every chirp and ring it had to go off and keep on going off. The attack was accomplished by means of a botnet, and for that I felt bad, but it was in the service of a good cause.
1
A few seconds later, Charles’s phone spazzed out spectacularly. I’d had tens of thousands of simultaneous random calls and text messages sent to it, causing every chirp and ring it had to go off and keep on going off. The attack was accomplished by means of a botnet, and for that I felt bad, but it was in the service of a good cause.32
1
Botnets are where infected computers spend their afterlives. When you get a worm or a virus, your computer sends a message to a chat channel on IRC — the Internet Relay Chat. That message tells the botmaster — the guy who deployed the worm — that the computers are there ready to do his bidding. Botnets are supremely powerful, since they can comprise thousands, even hundreds of thousands of computers, scattered all over the Internet, connected to juicy high-speed connections and running on fast home PCs. Those PCs normally function on behalf of their owners, but when the botmaster calls them, they rise like zombies to do his bidding.
1
Botnets are where infected computers spend their afterlives. When you get a worm or a virus, your computer sends a message to a chat channel on IRC — the Internet Relay Chat. That message tells the botmaster — the guy who deployed the worm — that the computers are there ready to do his bidding. Botnets are supremely powerful, since they can comprise thousands, even hundreds of thousands of computers, scattered all over the Internet, connected to juicy high-speed connections and running on fast home PCs. Those PCs normally function on behalf of their owners, but when the botmaster calls them, they rise like zombies to do his bidding.33
1
There are so many infected PCs on the Internet that the price of hiring an hour or two on a botnet has crashed. Mostly these things work for spammers as cheap, distributed spambots, filling your mailbox with come-ons for boner-pills or with new viruses that can infect you and recruit your machine to join the botnet.
1
There are so many infected PCs on the Internet that the price of hiring an hour or two on a botnet has crashed. Mostly these things work for spammers as cheap, distributed spambots, filling your mailbox with come-ons for boner-pills or with new viruses that can infect you and recruit your machine to join the botnet.34
I’d just rented 10 seconds’ time on three thousand PCs and had each of them send a text message or voice-over-IP call to Charles’s phone, whose number I’d extracted from a sticky note on Benson’s desk during one fateful office-visit.
I’d just rented 10 seconds’ time on three thousand PCs and had each of them send a text message or voice-over-IP call to Charles’s phone, whose number I’d extracted from a sticky note on Benson’s desk during one fateful office-visit.35
1
Needless to say, Charles’s phone was not equipped to handle this. First the SMSes filled the memory on his phone, causing it to start choking on the routine operations it needed to do things like manage the ringer and log all those incoming calls’ bogus return numbers (did you know that it’s really easy to fake the return number on a caller ID? There are about fifty ways of doing it — just google “spoof caller id”).
1
Needless to say, Charles’s phone was not equipped to handle this. First the SMSes filled the memory on his phone, causing it to start choking on the routine operations it needed to do things like manage the ringer and log all those incoming calls’ bogus return numbers (did you know that it’s really easy to fake the return number on a caller ID? There are about fifty ways of doing it — just google “spoof caller id”).36
Charles stared at it dumbfounded, and jabbed at it furiously, his thick eyebrows knotting and wiggling as he struggled with the demons that had possessed his most personal of devices. The plan was working so far, but he wasn’t doing what he was supposed to be doing next — he was supposed to go find some place to sit down and try to figure out how to get his phone back.
Charles stared at it dumbfounded, and jabbed at it furiously, his thick eyebrows knotting and wiggling as he struggled with the demons that had possessed his most personal of devices. The plan was working so far, but he wasn’t doing what he was supposed to be doing next — he was supposed to go find some place to sit down and try to figure out how to get his phone back.39
“I totaled his phone, but he’s just staring at it now instead of moving on.” It wasn’t going to be easy to reboot that thing. Once the memory was totally filled, it would have a hard time loading the code it needed to delete the bogus messages — and there was no bulk-erase for texts on his phone, so he’d have to manually delete all of the thousands of messages.
“I totaled his phone, but he’s just staring at it now instead of moving on.” It wasn’t going to be easy to reboot that thing. Once the memory was totally filled, it would have a hard time loading the code it needed to delete the bogus messages — and there was no bulk-erase for texts on his phone, so he’d have to manually delete all of the thousands of messages.40
Darryl shoved me back and stuck his eye up to the door. A moment later, his shoulders started to shake. I got scared, thinking he was panicking, but when he pulled back, I saw that he was laughing so hard that tears were streaming down his cheeks.
Darryl shoved me back and stuck his eye up to the door. A moment later, his shoulders started to shake. I got scared, thinking he was panicking, but when he pulled back, I saw that he was laughing so hard that tears were streaming down his cheeks.41
“Galvez just totally busted him for being in the halls during class and for having his phone out — you should have seen her tear into him. She was really enjoying it.”
“Galvez just totally busted him for being in the halls during class and for having his phone out — you should have seen her tear into him. She was really enjoying it.”42
We shook hands solemnly and snuck back out of the corridor, down the stairs, around the back, out the door, past the fence and out into the glorious sunlight of afternoon in the Mission. Valencia Street had never looked so good. I checked my watch and yelped.
We shook hands solemnly and snuck back out of the corridor, down the stairs, around the back, out the door, past the fence and out into the glorious sunlight of afternoon in the Mission. Valencia Street had never looked so good. I checked my watch and yelped.45
2
Van spotted us first. She was blending in with a group of Korean tourists, which is one of her favorite ways of camouflaging herself when she’s ditching school. Ever since the truancy moblog went live, our world is full of nosy shopkeepers and pecksniffs who take it upon themselves to snap our piccies and put them on the net where they can be perused by school administrators.
2
Van spotted us first. She was blending in with a group of Korean tourists, which is one of her favorite ways of camouflaging herself when she’s ditching school. Ever since the truancy moblog went live, our world is full of nosy shopkeepers and pecksniffs who take it upon themselves to snap our piccies and put them on the net where they can be perused by school administrators.46
She came out of the crowd and bounded toward us. Darryl has had a thing for Van since forever, and she’s sweet enough to pretend she doesn’t know it. She gave me a hug and then moved onto Darryl, giving him a quick sisterly kiss on the cheek that made him go red to the tops of his ears.
She came out of the crowd and bounded toward us. Darryl has had a thing for Van since forever, and she’s sweet enough to pretend she doesn’t know it. She gave me a hug and then moved onto Darryl, giving him a quick sisterly kiss on the cheek that made him go red to the tops of his ears.47
1
The two of them made a funny pair: Darryl is a little on the heavy side, though he wears it well, and he’s got a kind of pink complexion that goes red in the cheeks whenever he runs or gets excited. He’s been able to grow a beard since we were 14, but thankfully he started shaving after a brief period known to our gang as “the Lincoln years.” And he’s tall. Very, very tall. Like basketball player tall.
1
The two of them made a funny pair: Darryl is a little on the heavy side, though he wears it well, and he’s got a kind of pink complexion that goes red in the cheeks whenever he runs or gets excited. He’s been able to grow a beard since we were 14, but thankfully he started shaving after a brief period known to our gang as “the Lincoln years.” And he’s tall. Very, very tall. Like basketball player tall.48
Meanwhile, Van is half a head shorter than me, and skinny, with straight black hair that she wears in crazy, elaborate braids that she researches on the net. She’s got pretty coppery skin and dark eyes, and she loves big glass rings the size of radishes, which click and clack together when she dances.
Meanwhile, Van is half a head shorter than me, and skinny, with straight black hair that she wears in crazy, elaborate braids that she researches on the net. She’s got pretty coppery skin and dark eyes, and she loves big glass rings the size of radishes, which click and clack together when she dances.50
“How are you, Van?” Darryl asked in a choked voice. He always ran a step behind the conversation when it came to Van.
“How are you, Van?” Darryl asked in a choked voice. He always ran a step behind the conversation when it came to Van.51
“I’m great, D. How’s your every little thing?” Oh, she was a bad, bad person. Darryl nearly fainted.
“I’m great, D. How’s your every little thing?” Oh, she was a bad, bad person. Darryl nearly fainted.52
1
Jolu saved him from social disgrace by showing up just then, in an oversize leather baseball jacket, sharp sneakers, and a meshback cap advertising our favorite Mexican masked wrestler, El Santo Junior. Jolu is Jose Luis Torrez, the completing member of our foursome. He went to a super-strict Catholic school in the Outer Richmond, so it wasn’t easy for him to get out. But he always did: no one exfiltrated like our Jolu. He liked his jacket because it hung down low — which was pretty stylish in parts of the city — and covered up all his Catholic school crap, which was like a bulls-eye for nosy jerks with the truancy moblog bookmarked on their phones.
1
Jolu saved him from social disgrace by showing up just then, in an oversize leather baseball jacket, sharp sneakers, and a meshback cap advertising our favorite Mexican masked wrestler, El Santo Junior. Jolu is Jose Luis Torrez, the completing member of our foursome. He went to a super-strict Catholic school in the Outer Richmond, so it wasn’t easy for him to get out. But he always did: no one exfiltrated like our Jolu. He liked his jacket because it hung down low — which was pretty stylish in parts of the city — and covered up all his Catholic school crap, which was like a bulls-eye for nosy jerks with the truancy moblog bookmarked on their phones.53
2
“Who’s ready to go?” I asked, once we’d all said hello. I pulled out my phone and showed them the map I’d downloaded to it on the BART. “Near as I can work out, we wanna go up to the Nikko again, then one block past it to O’Farrell, then left up toward Van Ness. Somewhere in there we should find the wireless signal.”
2
“Who’s ready to go?” I asked, once we’d all said hello. I pulled out my phone and showed them the map I’d downloaded to it on the BART. “Near as I can work out, we wanna go up to the Nikko again, then one block past it to O’Farrell, then left up toward Van Ness. Somewhere in there we should find the wireless signal.”54
1
Van made a face. “That’s a nasty part of the Tenderloin.” I couldn’t argue with her. That part of San Francisco is one of the weird bits — you go in through the Hilton’s front entrance and it’s all touristy stuff like the cable-car turnaround and family restaurants. Go through to the other side and you’re in the ‘Loin, where every tracked out transvestite hooker, hard-case pimp, hissing drug dealer and cracked up homeless person in town was concentrated. What they bought and sold, none of us were old enough to be a part of (though there were plenty of hookers our age plying their trade in the ‘Loin.)
1
Van made a face. “That’s a nasty part of the Tenderloin.” I couldn’t argue with her. That part of San Francisco is one of the weird bits — you go in through the Hilton’s front entrance and it’s all touristy stuff like the cable-car turnaround and family restaurants. Go through to the other side and you’re in the ‘Loin, where every tracked out transvestite hooker, hard-case pimp, hissing drug dealer and cracked up homeless person in town was concentrated. What they bought and sold, none of us were old enough to be a part of (though there were plenty of hookers our age plying their trade in the ‘Loin.)55
“Look on the bright side,” I said. “The only time you want to go up around there is broad daylight. None of the other players are going to go near it until tomorrow at the earliest. This is what we in the ARG business call a monster head start.”
“Look on the bright side,” I said. “The only time you want to go up around there is broad daylight. None of the other players are going to go near it until tomorrow at the earliest. This is what we in the ARG business call a monster head start.”58
“We going to talk or we going to win?” Van said. After me, she was hands-down the most hardcore player in our group. She took winning very, very seriously.
“We going to talk or we going to win?” Van said. After me, she was hands-down the most hardcore player in our group. She took winning very, very seriously.59
We struck out, four good friends, on our way to decode a clue, win the game — and lose everything we cared about, forever.
We struck out, four good friends, on our way to decode a clue, win the game — and lose everything we cared about, forever.61
The physical component of today’s clue was a set of GPS coordinates — there were coordinates for all the major cities where Harajuku Fun Madness was played — where we’d find a WiFi access-point’s signal. That signal was being deliberately jammed by another, nearby WiFi point that was hidden so that it couldn’t be spotted by conventional wifinders, little key-fobs that told you when you were within range of someone’s open access-point, which you could use for free.
The physical component of today’s clue was a set of GPS coordinates — there were coordinates for all the major cities where Harajuku Fun Madness was played — where we’d find a WiFi access-point’s signal. That signal was being deliberately jammed by another, nearby WiFi point that was hidden so that it couldn’t be spotted by conventional wifinders, little key-fobs that told you when you were within range of someone’s open access-point, which you could use for free.62
1
We’d have to track down the location of the “hidden” access point by measuring the strength of the “visible” one, finding the spot where it was most mysteriously weakest. There we’d find another clue — last time it had been in the special of the day at Anzu, the swanky sushi restaurant in the Nikko hotel in the Tenderloin. The Nikko was owned by Japan Airlines, one of Harajuku Fun Madness’s sponsors, and the staff had all made a big fuss over us when we finally tracked down the clue. They’d given us bowls of miso soup and made us try uni, which is sushi made from sea urchin, with the texture of very runny cheese and a smell like very runny dog-droppings. But it tasted really good. Or so Darryl told me. I wasn’t going to eat that stuff.
1
We’d have to track down the location of the “hidden” access point by measuring the strength of the “visible” one, finding the spot where it was most mysteriously weakest. There we’d find another clue — last time it had been in the special of the day at Anzu, the swanky sushi restaurant in the Nikko hotel in the Tenderloin. The Nikko was owned by Japan Airlines, one of Harajuku Fun Madness’s sponsors, and the staff had all made a big fuss over us when we finally tracked down the clue. They’d given us bowls of miso soup and made us try uni, which is sushi made from sea urchin, with the texture of very runny cheese and a smell like very runny dog-droppings. But it tasted really good. Or so Darryl told me. I wasn’t going to eat that stuff.63
1
I picked up the WiFi signal with my phone’s wifinder about three blocks up O’Farrell, just before Hyde Street, in front of a dodgy “Asian Massage Parlor” with a red blinking CLOSED sign in the window. The network’s name was HarajukuFM, so we knew we had the right spot.
1
I picked up the WiFi signal with my phone’s wifinder about three blocks up O’Farrell, just before Hyde Street, in front of a dodgy “Asian Massage Parlor” with a red blinking CLOSED sign in the window. The network’s name was HarajukuFM, so we knew we had the right spot.66
Darryl and Van had phones with built-in wifinders, while Jolu, being too cool to carry a phone bigger than his pinky finger, had a separate little directional fob.
Darryl and Van had phones with built-in wifinders, while Jolu, being too cool to carry a phone bigger than his pinky finger, had a separate little directional fob.67
“OK, fan out and see what we see. You’re looking for a sharp drop off in the signal that gets worse the more you move along it.”
“OK, fan out and see what we see. You’re looking for a sharp drop off in the signal that gets worse the more you move along it.”68
I took a step backward and ended up standing on someone’s toes. A female voice said “oof” and I spun around, worried that some crack-ho was going to stab me for breaking her heels.
I took a step backward and ended up standing on someone’s toes. A female voice said “oof” and I spun around, worried that some crack-ho was going to stab me for breaking her heels.69
Instead, I found myself face to face with another kid my age. She had a shock of bright pink hair and a sharp, rodent-like face, with big sunglasses that were practically air-force goggles. She was dressed in striped tights beneath a black granny dress, with lots of little Japanese decorer toys safety pinned to it — anime characters, old world leaders, emblems from foreign soda-pop.
Instead, I found myself face to face with another kid my age. She had a shock of bright pink hair and a sharp, rodent-like face, with big sunglasses that were practically air-force goggles. She was dressed in striped tights beneath a black granny dress, with lots of little Japanese decorer toys safety pinned to it — anime characters, old world leaders, emblems from foreign soda-pop.73
“I will,” she said. “I will send this photo to truant watch in thirty seconds unless you four back off from this clue and let me and my friends here run it down. You can come back in one hour and it’ll be all yours. I think that’s more than fair.”
“I will,” she said. “I will send this photo to truant watch in thirty seconds unless you four back off from this clue and let me and my friends here run it down. You can come back in one hour and it’ll be all yours. I think that’s more than fair.”74
I looked behind her and noticed three other girls in similar garb — one with blue hair, one with green, and one with purple. “Who are you supposed to be, the Popsicle Squad?”
I looked behind her and noticed three other girls in similar garb — one with blue hair, one with green, and one with purple. “Who are you supposed to be, the Popsicle Squad?”75
“We’re the team that’s going to kick your team’s ass at Harajuku Fun Madness,” she said. “And I’m the one who’s right this second about to upload your photo and get you in so much trouble –”
“We’re the team that’s going to kick your team’s ass at Harajuku Fun Madness,” she said. “And I’m the one who’s right this second about to upload your photo and get you in so much trouble –”76
Behind me I felt Van start forward. Her all-girls school was notorious for its brawls, and I was pretty sure she was ready to knock this chick’s block off.
Behind me I felt Van start forward. Her all-girls school was notorious for its brawls, and I was pretty sure she was ready to knock this chick’s block off.78
We felt it first, that sickening lurch of the cement under your feet that every Californian knows instinctively — earthquake. My first inclination, as always, was to get away: “when in trouble or in doubt, run in circles, scream and shout.” But the fact was, we were already in the safest place we could be, not in a building that could fall in on us, not out toward the middle of the road where bits of falling cornice could brain us.
We felt it first, that sickening lurch of the cement under your feet that every Californian knows instinctively — earthquake. My first inclination, as always, was to get away: “when in trouble or in doubt, run in circles, scream and shout.” But the fact was, we were already in the safest place we could be, not in a building that could fall in on us, not out toward the middle of the road where bits of falling cornice could brain us.79
1
Earthquakes are eerily quiet — at first, anyway — but this wasn’t quiet. This was loud, an incredible roaring sound that was louder than anything I’d ever heard before. The sound was so punishing it drove me to my knees, and I wasn’t the only one. Darryl shook my arm and pointed over the buildings and we saw it then: a huge black cloud rising from the northeast, from the direction of the Bay.
1
Earthquakes are eerily quiet — at first, anyway — but this wasn’t quiet. This was loud, an incredible roaring sound that was louder than anything I’d ever heard before. The sound was so punishing it drove me to my knees, and I wasn’t the only one. Darryl shook my arm and pointed over the buildings and we saw it then: a huge black cloud rising from the northeast, from the direction of the Bay.80
There was another rumble, and the cloud of smoke spread out, that spreading black shape we’d all grown up seeing in movies. Someone had just blown up something, in a big way.
There was another rumble, and the cloud of smoke spread out, that spreading black shape we’d all grown up seeing in movies. Someone had just blown up something, in a big way.81
There were more rumbles and more tremors. Heads appeared at windows up and down the street. We all looked at the mushroom cloud in silence.
There were more rumbles and more tremors. Heads appeared at windows up and down the street. We all looked at the mushroom cloud in silence.83
I’d heard sirens like these before — they test the civil defense sirens at noon on Tuesdays. But I’d only heard them go off unscheduled in old war movies and video games, the kind where someone is bombing someone else from above. Air raid sirens. The wooooooo sound made it all less real.
I’d heard sirens like these before — they test the civil defense sirens at noon on Tuesdays. But I’d only heard them go off unscheduled in old war movies and video games, the kind where someone is bombing someone else from above. Air raid sirens. The wooooooo sound made it all less real.84
“Report to shelters immediately.” It was like the voice of God, coming from all places at once. There were speakers on some of the electric poles, something I’d never noticed before, and they’d all switched on at once.
“Report to shelters immediately.” It was like the voice of God, coming from all places at once. There were speakers on some of the electric poles, something I’d never noticed before, and they’d all switched on at once.85
“Report to shelters immediately.” Shelters? We looked at each other in confusion. What shelters? The cloud was rising steadily, spreading out. Was it nuclear? Were we breathing in our last breaths?
“Report to shelters immediately.” Shelters? We looked at each other in confusion. What shelters? The cloud was rising steadily, spreading out. Was it nuclear? Were we breathing in our last breaths?86
The girl with the pink hair grabbed her friends and they tore ass downhill, back toward the BART station and the foot of the hills.
The girl with the pink hair grabbed her friends and they tore ass downhill, back toward the BART station and the foot of the hills.87
“REPORT TO SHELTERS IMMEDIATELY.” There was screaming now, and a lot of running around. Tourists — you can always spot the tourists, they’re the ones who think CALIFORNIA = WARM and spend their San Francisco holidays freezing in shorts and t-shirts — scattered in every direction.
“REPORT TO SHELTERS IMMEDIATELY.” There was screaming now, and a lot of running around. Tourists — you can always spot the tourists, they’re the ones who think CALIFORNIA = WARM and spend their San Francisco holidays freezing in shorts and t-shirts — scattered in every direction.88
“We should go!” Darryl hollered in my ear, just barely audible over the shrieking of the sirens, which had been joined by traditional police sirens. A dozen SFPD cruisers screamed past us.
“We should go!” Darryl hollered in my ear, just barely audible over the shrieking of the sirens, which had been joined by traditional police sirens. A dozen SFPD cruisers screamed past us.90
“Down to the BART station,” I hollered. My friends nodded. We closed ranks and began to move quickly downhill.
“Down to the BART station,” I hollered. My friends nodded. We closed ranks and began to move quickly downhill.
The term “pecksniff” is a reference to a villain in Charles Dickens’ “Martin Chuzzlewit”.
Isn’t 30 seconds a bit much? Wont they burn out in just a couple of seconds?
According to Instructables, it would only take 5 seconds in a microwave to destroy an RFID chip. However, Little Brother indicates that 30 seconds is sufficient to destroy “pretty much every” RFID on the market. RFID manufacturers often post operating temperature ranges, and one example of a high rated transponder indicates that it can sustain temperatures of 428°F for 30 seconds.
Microwave power/temperature correlations vary by model, but one source sites a model with 650-800 watts of power generating 425-500°F at 90-100% power.
At first glance, to safely assume an RFID chip will be destroyed by a microwave of unknown wattage, 30 seconds appears to be the minimum “safe” time. However, microwave object temperature does not immediately reach the top temperature. Wattage affects how quickly temperatures of materials are reached, and thus 30 seconds is not the literal minimum safe time for the chip linked to as an example above. Instead, it is the minimum safe time once the object has reached that temperature. It’s unlikely that Marcus would have been able to nuke the 428°F rated chip in just a few seconds at what was probably a low-wattage microwave, but that also may depend on exactly how the RFID chip materials are affected by microwaves.
Also, it is questionable whether “temperature” is a good gauge of how a microwave affects its occupants. According to some of the comments on the Built on Facts Science Blog, temperature is not a meaningful measure in microwaves because radiation inside a microwave does not have a thermal spectrum. However, for purposes of determining whether an RFID chip would survive, it should be sufficient that objects subjected to microwaves attain a certain measurable temperature. If the RFID chip in Little Brother was rated to 428°F for 30 seconds, then the microwave holding the chip must cause the temperature of the RFID chip to reach and at least maintain a temperature of 428°F for 30 seconds for the chip to at least void its warranty. But just because a chip is rated such does not mean it will necessarily be fully destroyed after reaching the rating maximum. It’s quite possible that, depending on the wattage of the microwave, it would require even a longer time in the microwave to “ensure” destruction.
Chip and housing material would also have an effect on whether any microwave would be sufficient. Considering the RFID chips in the book were designed to prevent students from skipping school, it’s unlikely that the school would spend the amount of money necessary to buy chips that could survive nuking for more than a few seconds. Note that the book does not say exactly how many seconds were used to destroy the RFID book chip, though the sparks suggest that the chip died (however, some metals cause sparking in microwaves that may be mistaken for destruction). (The “conscientious” wrapping of a book in paper towels, however, was a tremendous fire hazard unless the paper towels were wet.)
The material of the RFID chip would affect the temperature, as indirectly demonstrated by a patent application for Microwave susceptor film to control the temperature of cooking foods (Under Detailed Description of the Invention, see notes for FIG. 4, describing the author’s representative plot of the coefficients of reflected, transmitted, and absorbed microwave energy as a function of resistivity). The USDA has also noted that wrapping foods in aluminum foil will act as a shield, since microwaves cannot pass through metal. This fact would suggest that if an RFID were wrapped in a similar protective metal that doesn’t interfere with the chip’s ability to operate, it might be extremely resistant to microwaves.
A patent issued in 2001 describes a High temperature RFID tag that, according to the patent, can survive at 275°F, but with a housing that would survive at 572°F “without substantially affecting the intended functions of the tag.”
Thus, there are multiple factors involved in determining whether an RFID chip would become disabled due to exposure to microwaves in a microwave oven.
1. Microwave wattage (relates to the time necessary for an object to reach a certain temperature).
2. Time in microwave (at low wattage, more time may be necessary).
3. RFID chip materials (some chips are designed specifically to survive in harsh conditions).
4. RFID chip housing materials (it’s possible that some chips would be designed with microwave-resistant housing).
In the book’s scenario, the main character is giving a bit of “playing it safe” advice based on that character’s limited knowledge of RFID chips, but it’s likely that there exist chips that would have survived a 30-second nuking, especially considering the microwave and RFID housing used.
For the fun of it, see the USDA’s “Time-to-Boil Test” for microwave ovens to determine wattage:
Measure a cup of water in a 2-cup glass measure. Add ice cubes; stir until water is ice cold. Discard ice cubes and pour out any water more than 1 cup. Set the microwave on high 4 minutes, but watch the water through the window to see when it boils.
* If water boils in less than 2 minutes, it is a very high wattage oven 1000 watts or more.
* If water boils in 2½ minutes, it is a high wattage oven about 800 watts or more.
* If water boils in 3 minutes, it is an average wattage oven 650 to 700 watts or more.
* If water boils in more than 3 minutes or not by 4 minutes, it is a slow oven 300 to 500 watts.
According to Instructables, it would only take 5 seconds in a microwave to destroy an RFID chip. However, Little Brother indicates that 30 seconds is sufficient to destroy “pretty much every” RFID on the market. RFID manufacturers often post operating temperature ranges, and one example of a high rated transponder indicates that it can sustain temperatures of 428°F for 30 seconds.
Microwave power/temperature correlations vary by model, but one source sites a model with 650-800 watts of power generating 425-500°F at 90-100% power.
At first glance, to safely assume an RFID chip will be destroyed by a microwave of unknown wattage, 30 seconds appears to be the minimum “safe” time. However, microwave object temperature does not immediately reach the top temperature. Wattage affects how quickly temperatures of materials are reached, and thus 30 seconds is not the literal minimum safe time for the chip linked to as an example above. Instead, it is the minimum safe time once the object has reached that temperature. It’s unlikely that Marcus would have been able to nuke the 428°F rated chip in just a few seconds at what was probably a low-wattage microwave, but that also may depend on exactly how the RFID chip materials are affected by microwaves.
Also, it is questionable whether “temperature” is a good gauge of how a microwave affects its occupants. According to some of the comments on the Built on Facts Science Blog, temperature is not a meaningful measure in microwaves because radiation inside a microwave does not have a thermal spectrum. However, for purposes of determining whether an RFID chip would survive, it should be sufficient that objects subjected to microwaves attain a certain measurable temperature. If the RFID chip in Little Brother was rated to 428°F for 30 seconds, then the microwave holding the chip must cause the temperature of the RFID chip to reach and at least maintain a temperature of 428°F for 30 seconds for the chip to at least void its warranty. But just because a chip is rated such does not mean it will necessarily be fully destroyed after reaching the rating maximum.
It’s quite possible that, depending on the wattage of the microwave, it would require even a longer time in the microwave to “ensure” destruction.
Chip and housing material would also have an effect on whether any microwave would be sufficient. Considering the RFID chips in the book were designed to prevent students from skipping school, it’s unlikely that the school would spend the amount of money necessary to buy chips that could survive nuking for more than a few seconds. Note that the book does not say exactly how many seconds were used to destroy the RFID book chip, though the sparks suggest that the chip died (however, some metals cause sparking in microwaves that may be mistaken for destruction). (The “conscientious” wrapping of a book in paper towels, however, was a tremendous fire hazard unless the paper towels were wet.)
The material of the RFID chip would affect the temperature, as indirectly demonstrated by a patent application for Microwave susceptor film to control the temperature of cooking foods (Under Detailed Description of the Invention, see notes for FIG. 4, describing the author’s representative plot of the coefficients of reflected, transmitted, and absorbed microwave energy as a function of resistivity). The USDA has also noted that wrapping foods in aluminum foil will act as a shield, since microwaves cannot pass through metal. This fact would suggest that if an RFID were wrapped in a similar protective metal that doesn’t interfere with the chip’s ability to operate, it might be extremely resistant to microwaves.
A patent issued in 2001 describes a High temperature RFID tag that, according to the patent, can survive at 275°F, but with a housing that would survive at 572°F “without substantially affecting the intended functions of the tag.”
Thus, there are multiple factors involved in determining whether an RFID chip would become disabled due to exposure to microwaves in a microwave oven.
1. Microwave wattage (relates to the time necessary for an object to reach a certain temperature).
2. Time in microwave (at low wattage, more time may be necessary).
3. RFID chip materials (some chips are designed specifically to survive in harsh conditions).
4. RFID chip housing materials (it’s possible that some chips would be designed with microwave-resistant housing).
In the book’s scenario, the main character is giving a bit of “playing it safe” advice based on that character’s limited knowledge of RFID chips, but it’s likely that there exist chips that would have survived a 30-second nuking, especially considering the microwave and RFID housing used.
For the fun of it, see the USDA’s “Time-to-Boil Test” for microwave ovens to determine wattage:
Measure a cup of water in a 2-cup glass measure. Add ice cubes; stir until water is ice cold. Discard ice cubes and pour out any water more than 1 cup. Set the microwave on high 4 minutes, but watch the water through the window to see when it boils.
* If water boils in less than 2 minutes, it is a very high wattage oven 1000 watts or more.
* If water boils in 2½ minutes, it is a high wattage oven about 800 watts or more.
* If water boils in 3 minutes, it is an average wattage oven 650 to 700 watts or more.
* If water boils in more than 3 minutes or not by 4 minutes, it is a slow oven 300 to 500 watts.
http://www.restaurantanzu.com/
Marcus explains LARPing in Chapter 1, Paragraph 74.
According to Dictionary.com, exfiltrate means:
–verb (used without object)
1. to escape furtively from an area under enemy control.
–verb (used with object)
2. to smuggle (military personnel) out of an area under enemy control.
Wikipedia defines exfiltration as “military jargon for exiting an area (usually behind enemy lines or in enemy territory). Exfiltration is the opposite of infiltration.
The removal of personnel or units from area under enemy control. The removal of personnel or units from areas under enemy control by stealth, deception, surprise, or clandestine means.
Exfiltration is also a term used by civil engineers. It is method for managing storm water runoff.
In computer terms, Exfiltration refers to the unauthorized release of data from within a computer system. This includes copying the data out through covert network channels or the copying of data to unauthorized media.”
See the etymology of exfiltrate at myEtymology.com.
BART Bay Area Rapid Transit – link is to the nearest BART Station to the Nikko Hotel.
UC Berkeley is one of the world’s top-rated universities. It is known to have the best of everything when it comes to students, professors, athletes, research facilities, and much more.
See: http://www.berkeley.edu/
Also see: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/University_of_California,_Berkeley
“On the juice” is code for the usage of anabolic steroids.
A milk tooth is otherwise known as a “baby tooth.” Milk/baby teeth come from a child’s first set, and are the ones that are usually left for the Tooth Fairy.
I was tempted to try out the “frozen grape in the microwave” experiment myself, and film it but I got scared. So I turned to YouTube. The “pretty” effect is at around 1:13 in.
I chose not to try the experiment because a) I don’t own my apartment b) Come to think of it, I don’t own my microwave c) I’m not a boy
I did, however, dig a little deeper:
Grapes contain electrolytes. Those electrolytes contain what we call “grape juice.” Grape juice is full of ions. Ions conduct electricity. The grape’s skin acts as a conductor. Microwaves cause ions to travel between the grape halves (Note: In the experiment, the frozen grape is cut in half). Superfluous energy heats the skin – which finally bursts into flame. Then, the electrons form an arc through the flame and the gap between the two grapes. The air is ionized into plasma. Plasma can conduct electricity – thus creating the “pretty” sight Marcus is so fond of.
See the Popular Science blog entry, “Grape Balls of Fire”
A botnet refers to a group of computers that contain software that is controlled remotely. That software permits hackers to run various programs without users knowing. Botnets are hard to detect, and hackers often use them to distribute spam and conduct fraudulent activities. Sometimes botnets are essentially rented out to spammers, thereby evading the notice of ISPs, which do not permit spamming. See: http://www.wisegeek.com/what-is-a-botnet.htm
Dictionary.com defines an “infraction” as a breach; violation; infringement. While an infraction is not a crime, as stated by W1N5TON, it does mean (in this case) to break the rules set by the school.
Each school or school district has different policies regarding infractions. El Modena High School in Orange, California issues “demerits” to students guilty of breaking school rules. Ten demerits will cause a student to lose privileges to attend school functions such as prom, football games, even graduation.
I was not sold on W1N5TON’s statement that it is easy to fake the return number on caller ID. I decided to google it, as suggested, and here is what I found.
Apparently, it is not entirely unheard of to “spoof caller ID” or hack in and control the number that appears on the caller ID screen on the other line. I have never heard of this before but found many search results. The first result to check out is one that defines the act on wikipedia
Next, I looked at a site that was dedicated to spoofing.
Who would have guessed that it is something that has been done ever since the earliest days of caller ID?
A piccie is a small picture. See for yourself on Urban Dictionary
Much of Mexican wrestling is defined by the colorful masks worn. El Santo Junior is no exception.
The masks have historical significance in Lucha libre and date back to the days of the Aztec Indians. They relate to animals, gods, and ancient heroes. These features, along with bright colors, signify the identity of the wrestler.
Establishing identity is a large part of the success of the wrestler’s career in not only Lucha libre but american wrestling as well.
Example:
mIRC: Internet Relay Chat client
The most popular shareware IRC chat client for Windows.
http://www.mirc.com
Civic center station is the BART station closest to Van Ness Ave. in SF.
http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20070509133816AA3W8Oz
Tenderloin is a small, densely populated neighborhood in downtown San Francisco. In addition to its rich history and diverse community, there is significant poverty, homelessness, and crime.
See: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tenderloin,_San_Francisco,_California
The average National Basketball association player is 6′6.98″ tall, according to NBA.com
“Dodgy” is an synonym for “sketchy.” British people use the term much more often than Americans do. “Asian Massage Parlors” are associated with erotic massages.
Amazon.com was named after the world’s largest river and formed a logo that now lends well to the company’s ability to have plethora of products. Their logo, an arrow forming a smile leading from A to Z, represents customer satisfaction their goal of having every product in the alphabet.
More – http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Amazon.com
Apparently grapes and microwaves go together. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vCNNqgKqnaQ
The use of “juice” a commonly used term describing anabolic steroid consumption has been a hot topic in professional and high school sports in recent years. Anabolic steroids are used by many athletes to enhance performance, through increased levels of testosterone which increases the build up of cellular tissue, especially muscular tissue.
Steroids consumption is illegal in many countries due to the negative changes that occur both emotionally and physically. While the sale of these drugs is illegal without perscription in the US, they are still quite easy to come by because of the Internet. The sale of these kinds of illegal substances has been hard to track down because of online stores and the lack of valid e mails, names and companies. 2 The internet and interactive communications tools have facilitated the trade and sale of these substances all over the world. This problem and the issues surrounding it will only continue to evolve as the Internet and interactive communications do.
1. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anabolic_steroid
2. http://bit.ly/S2RZ0
Accordning to dictonary.com, the term Nuke is typically used as follows:
“noun
1. a nuclear or thermonuclear weapon.
2. a nuclear power plant or nuclear reactor.
3. nuclear energy: to convert from coal to nuke.
–adjective 4. of or pertaining to a nuclear or thermonuclear weapon or to a nuclear plant.”
In this case, the term is used as slang meaning to microwave something.
According to Geocache.com, caches are a series of high tech treasure hunts that take place all over the world using GPS coordinates.
There are currently approximately 899,909 going on all over the world.
The first Geocache was hidden by Dave Umler in Portland.
Link to orginal footage from April 2000.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LMHZcgM11GU
The term WIFI was created by a cosulting firm hired in 1999 who was asked to create a term that was more “catchy” than Wireless Fidelity.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wi-Fi#Wi-Fi_Alliance
Another poker reference by Marcus. Considering hacking can involve social engineering, “the act of manipulating people into performing actions or divulging confidential information”, the ability to read people and respond in a way that they will trust you is a valuable skill. Poker helps with developing that sense.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Social_engineering_%28security%29
Children’s Hospital Boston explains why keeping your anger in check is good for your health in this anger management guide for teens.
“Fink on” is another way of saying “to snitch on.”
An antivirus, anti-spam, end point security, data protection and network security software company called Sophos reports that among the 25 most common words used in spam, nearly 40% are related to health and more than half of that 40% are related to erectile dysfunction.
The U.S. Geological Survey explains that a large earthquake nearby will feel like a sudden large jolt followed quickly by more strong shaking that may last a few seconds or up to a couple of minutes if it’s a rare great event. The shaking will feel violent and it will be difficult to stand up.
“Arphid” is a mnemonic device to remember the acronym RFID, which stands for radio-frequency identification device. Such devices are embedded on or applied to a person, animal or product to keep track of its whereabouts. For more on such devices, go to http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Radio-frequency_identification. “Killing” arphids appears to mean, in this context, rendering them useless. The author likens destroying these devices’ functionality to masking the barcodes that exist on merchandise at a shopping market and are used to identify the price of an item as it is put through a scanner. For more on barcodes (or bar codes), go to http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Radio-frequency_identification. To see what a barcode looks like, go here: http://www.greatdreams.com/sacred/bar_code.gif
Kill signals already are routinely used in commercial applications. After the purchase of a product, sales staff usually deactivates RFID tags for privacy protection. But some RFID tags are left on, for various reasons. As discussed in this paper, one approach to protect privacy is to use blocker tags that allow consumers to reveal some RFID devices and block others: http://www.rsa.com/rsalabs/staff/bios/ajuels/publications/blocker-full/blocker-full.pdf.
RFIDs can be reprogrammed, but it takes expertise, and giving consumers the ability to do so might be expensive or not be in the interest of marketers, according to this article: http://www.rsa.com/rsalabs/staff/bios/ajuels/publications/blocker-full/blocker-full.pdf
A study of 47 urban schools in 12 states conducted in 1998-1999 and reported in 2002 showed that only about 0.2 percent of students are expelled in any given year. For more information, check the report: http://www.cdli.ca/tesic/Nippard_pdf/class_management/parental_involvement_in_discipline.pdf
In fact, a guidebook for dealing with rat infestations in schools advises to check the teachers’ lounges carefully and make sure that containers of food have lids on tightly. See http://apps.cdpr.ca.gov/schoolipm/managing_pests/gdebook/rats.pdf